Amidst all of our siege mentality, let's plan for a return to post-Covid siege life. What do I mean--women's clothing.
Women have long put up with clothing that we cannot fasten ourselves. Back in the Downton Abbey days, dressing milady was the job for the lady's maid. The clothing all buttoned up the back. Corsets needed to be pulled and tied by the maid. Shoes needed to be fastened with a special device. Probably by the maid as well.
Now few of us have a lady's maid whose job is only to dress us up. But clothes have not adapted to changing times. Neither have our bodies. What do I mean? Good dresses zip up the back. Better dresses zip up the side, up to the L breast. Many dresses, once you zip them up the back, need to be fastened at the tippy-top with a hook and eye fastener. Before you even get there, you need to put on your bra. Which fastens with anywhere from two to four hook and eyes. Or, if you are an A cup, you can put one up over your head and place the girls in. Beyond an A cup, it is torturous to hold up your hands, place the tight band around your hands, get your arms through, pull over the girls, and resume dressing. Then, you need to get the standard bra, put it up over your girls and shoulders, pull your shoulders back, put your hands in back, and fasten--and it won't happen unless all the hooks are aligned. Sometimes you have to remove it several times, align the hooks, and hope they stay aligned while you pull it on and over. Not to mention full-figured female athletes are advised to wear two--count them two bras while participating in sports. Twice the agony, twice the twisting and fastening using senses only. Not to mention, it is a common trop in romcoms to show that men cannot undo a bra either, and as part of the seduction, the woman has to show him.
So, in response to the divergent thought question--what would you do with an extra hand--I'd be able to dress myself with comfort and ease. And I'd place the third eye in the back of my neck, the better to check the hook and eye alignment.
And bras just don't work. Even with the instrument of torture wires, they don't hold you up and they don't support. And the wires dig into you at the end of the day. The cups don't hold in the girls and they splash out at the sides, creating an disturbing silhoutte.
And back in the 1960's, women's jeans zipped up the sides.
Why is this necessary? Men's garments all fasten front-ward. Can you imagine if a man had to use a side zip for his jeans, or fasten his shirt by buttoning up in the back?
Is it because men design women's wear? Is it because women have no reasonable choice? Diane Von Furstenberg dresses all tie--but then those dresses won't stay put. They need to fasten as well. So--hello breeze, hello I see London and France. All this and the pleasure of coutere. Which means hideously expensive. Coutere designers, regardless of sex, apparently fail to see a world where women have to walk outside.
So all women must be acrobats, both at the beginning of the day and at the end (it is not necessarily easier to unzip a back fastener than to zip it up in the first place).
We have ergonomic engineers whose job it is to design cars so that the dashboards don't overwhelm the drivers. Why do we have cup containers and CD disc storage bars? Why seat belts and shoulder belts? Because of ergonomic engineers. We don't use cars the way we did in 1925. People spend all day in their car, dining, etc. And interior car design has adapted. Cars are safer because of these changes. We have ergonomic engineers to design proper fitting chairs and desks. Why don't fashion design get an ergonomic engineer to refit women's wear?
And while there are more storage places in your car, there are less in your dress. Women's slacks have fewer and less functional pockets. Women's dresses none. Where are we supposed to store our keys? We must always carry a purse or a tote. Don't they get it? Women have internal plumbing. Why must we suffer with external storage?
Designers need to pay attention. They need to consult with fashion conscious ergonomic engineers. It needs to be done. It is simply latent sexism. And ageism. As women age, it becomes harder and harder to do the backwards dance. How many women just let their breasts sag in their shirts because they just can't fasten a bra, or lift their arms up high enough to get the other type on? So older women who desire independence end up dressed like ragamuffins, too embarrassed to admit that they can't do it anymore.
Shame on us for getting to this place in women's wear. We need to change our clothing lines.