Don't think, dear unknown reader, that just because I read more, I laze more. Even in Unfunky, part of the day was spent in physical activity--then it was tennis. Problem--tennis requires another. Sadly, I would bat a ball against the side of my parent's house and have fantasy games. I would ride my bike to the local community college and go swimming. I always spent part of the day moving.
And so it continues. I have been taking kayaking lessons. Kayaking is one way to feel free again. And to engage in my fantasy life with Viggo Mortensen or Evanovich's Ranger. Free in my body. Free in my mind.
Kayaking lessons involves proper stroking. And safety. What happens if your kayak capsizes? Wrong answer--you're screwed. Right answer--pick yourself up, drag yourself inside, and oar all over again.
This is known as the wet exit and recovery.
DId I mention that I take lessons in the Hudson River?
Did I mention I got my tetanus shot a few months back (I stepped on a nail with my bare foot, so it seemed to logically follow). So, that was checked off the bucket list.
What I put in my locker: Listerine, glasses, contact lens case, goggles, saline solution, towel, spare clothes.
I assumed my instructor would capsize me. No--I have to capsize myself. That is very difficult to do--I kept rocking my kayak, to no avail. Finally, I did it right and out and under I went. The under part is frightening. Everything turns brown. The water goes right under the goggles and in your mouth. Finally, since I'm in a life vest, I bob back up. I tread water for a few minutes. I'm still dazed. It's even worse than expected. I can't see to remove my kayak skirt--but my instructor tells me it is off. The kayak is upside down and I cannot right it myself. I just want to tow it back to the dock and swim, but this is a class, so I cannot. The cold brown water encircles my lower half. I have an intense taste of salt and death in my mouth, but I am not allowed to quit until I follow directions and with his help, right the boat and get back in. Then I can go back to the dock.
Finally, I am allowed to go clean myself up. I take a quick shower, gargle, remove the contact lenses. Go back and clean the kayak. Go back and change into dry clothes. Take another quick gargle. And schedule another lesson.
I do wish I had it on video. It is funnier to watch than to endure.